Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Look and Listen

Recently, the Father Factor blog asked teen-agers what they expected out of their parents. The results reminded me that we should take time to listen to our children, not because they are always right, but because sometimes we are not always right. Plus, some of the items can apply to children of all ages, not just teen-agers.
  • Don't be my coach. Be my parent. Just be there and tell me I did a good job, but let the coaches do the coaching.
  • Communication is really important to avoid hurt feelings.
  • Trust us to do the right thing. You raised us right, so let us make decisions.
  • Give us space when we ask for it.
  • Notice when we do things right, not just when we do things wrong.
  • Spend time with us and really listen to what we say.
  • Don't embarrass us in front of your friends or tell people stuff about me.
  • Take time to understand what is going on in my life so you know what I'm going through.
  • Don't always be a parent...sometimes be a friend, because I tell things to friends that I wouldn't tell to my parents.
  • Listen to us, because we might say something you hadn't already thought of.
I'm interested to know what everyone else thinks. Do you agree? Are some points more valid than others?

1 comment:

  1. I think they are all excellent things to remember. In particular, I remember one of Molly's swim coaches telling me point number one, not because I was trying to coach, but because she was just getting started and I was asking him what we, as parents, should be doing on our end to reinforce what he was doing with them in the pool. When he told me almost exactly what you have quoted there, I knew he was a good coach.

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