On the Law of Primogeniture

As an older brother, Old Wahoo always believed in the Law of Primogeniture, a custom in which the eldest son inherits all of the estate from his parents, or at least in the Law of I Am Always the Boss of My Younger Brother.

As a parent, though, Old Wahoo and Mrs. Wahoo, herself the eldest of three children, watched in horror as our oldest son bossed his younger brothers around. We wondered if we were that way, too, as older siblings, and it took about two seconds before we realized the truth: we were.

With that in mind, we've tried to keep the eldest from being too demanding and the youngest from being too whiny. Nevertheless, certain traits have burst forth. The eldest son loves to give instructions. The middle son wants to please everyone. The youngest son demands to be included in everything.

A recent article in The New York Times examined birth order, and I imagine it will resonate with many people. Birth order can have lasting effects, as the author Perri Klass, M.D., states in the story.

Everyone takes it personally when it comes to birth order. After all, everyone is an oldest or a middle or a youngest or an only child, and even as adults we revert almost inevitably to a joke or resentment or rivalry that we’ve never quite outgrown.

But Klass argues that temperament matters more than birth order and makes a convincing case.

“Birth order doesn’t cause anything,” Dr. (Frank J.) Sulloway said. “It’s simply a proxy for the actual mechanisms that go on in family dynamics that shape character and personality.”

How has birth order affected you? Do you notice birth-order traits among your children?

And did anyone else believe in the Law of Primogeniture?